Archive for the ‘SRR’ Category

Speaker Standards….

September 3, 2006

regarding “speaker standards,” maybe you haven’t heard….

– I won the “Cat’s Meow” award at a conference once and am a 4 time winner of “Most Likely to Suck Seed” award

– I’ve been called “better than canned corn” by CCB television (did I tell you that they were amazed that I got *3* blog comments during my TV interview with them!)

– At DROP in Europe, I was the third highest ranked speaker (hmmm..there was only a model and retired milkman with no teeth as the other speakers)…but I was third!

– (editor’s note: there’s a first for everything…a real blogger actually used the following phrase…it’s too perfectly arrogant to change so I’ll cut and paste his words in full.  sometimes reality is funnier than parody)  “And, there aren’t many people alive who’ve interviewed the Office Live team as well as the Google Calendar team as well as the guy who runs the company that makes Open Office.”    (http://scobleizer.wordpress.com/2006/09/01/listening-to-shelley-powers-about-women-in-tech/  see comment #42)

– I’ve name-dropped every executive known to man, tamed tigers, incited wars, quelled rebellions, started revolutions, and ended bar fights. The syndication method SRR was even named after ME! When will you understand that it’s all about ME! If you know someone with better credentials and emails to prove it, show ME! 

Don’t take what I am saying as arrogance…just confidence. I’m so misunderstood. Besides, I dont really need to be a speaker anyway for the masses anyway.  My Google Juice is already back…so there!

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SRR, the way to go

August 29, 2006

Syndicated Roble Ramblings (SRR) is some sort of technology invented by someone else that lets people completely copy your blog posts in full and requires a separate app to use it (as well as carnal knowledge of XML and three arms with 15 fingers). There is no need for precision on my part here – for me everything is all about the VB IDE and any acronym with more than two letters is only techo-mumbo-jumbo to me.  I have faith that my minions are just shocked and awed with the full depth of my understanding about SRR (at least the marketeers and evangelists anyway).

Isn’t the value of SRR just insanely obvious based on my description above? Everyone should be using it right now in place of email, gravity, breathing, and cheesefries. (Oops…may have gone a bit far with the cheesefries hehe)  I’d link you to a few websites in private beta that use SRR but, oh yeah, you z-listers actually have to ask for a password.  sigh.

SRR is definitely the new pink – or the new “salmon” for those of you that don’t wear pink.  For some odd reason, everyone doesn’t use SRR today even though I’ve talked to 4000 industry leaders about it.  I even tried to blog about it from a Wal-mart in Montana. Although the smiley face hat may have helped in Montana, perhaps no one outside of the MechTeme circle will ever use SRR.  But SRR is why I am in the tech business – “tech” is defined as the having the following 5 criteria – Mechteme, TodPech, page rank, and Sicromoft. (It’s 4 I know but I’ve defined it as 5 in my book so dont argue, k?)  When you break free of the Z-List, you’ll gain pearls of wisdom at closed private tech elite functions where not just anyone gets an invite.  Witty, homespun sayings are just one of the benefits of these functions….

I’ll share one homespun saying for my minions to generate buzz about ME! – I’ll tell you the story about how I learned that success is only about adding a penny every day (or something like that but who cares if I get it right).  An old guy with a beard, thread-bare suit, and gnarled knuckles once asked me for a quarter (ugg, I disdain poor people unless they are geeks then thats ok and trust me this guy had no Smartphone) Since even he said “no” to my offer of my old red couch which has had many famous butts seated in it, I turned him down for the quarter of course. I still can’t figure why he called me an arrrrrrrrrooogggggggaaaannnnntttt baaaaasssstttaaaarrrrrdddddd (doesn’t he know that I once complained about the plight of poor people to Beve Stallmer at Sicromoft? Of course, I was referring to employees level 64s and below like ME!)   While blogging in my box seat (courtesy of Cark Muban) at the ballpark, the bum did get me thinking however, so be prepared to hang on every one of the following words:

“If you save a penny every day for 30 days that you’ll have more pennies than you can shake a stick at without being crooked as a dog’s hind leg. ”

So, minions, time to put ME! at the top of MechTeme! This philosophy has totally redefined why I am a geek.  Live it, breathe it, and use SRR (but don’t steal mine! I don’t care if “syndicated” is part of the acronym and fundamental definition of the functionality. It’s  my Google juice, Mine! Mine! Mine!)